Today I drove to Fayetteville to meet with my breast surgeon. Although I got there about twenty minutes before my appointment, I knew I'd have to wait. My doctor is awesome so I don't mind waiting. She takes a lot of time with each of her patients making sure they understand everything and is always patient with questions too. I knew it would be about half an hour before I'd see her, so I settled into my big, cozy chair in the waiting room and caught up on some emails.
Almost half an hour passed to the minute when I heard my name being called. Normally, the first stop after walking through the doorway into the back office is at a scale in most doctors' offices, but not so with my doctor. She says there's no point in weighing her patients since most of them will lose a few pounds within a visit or two (speaking of the removal of one or both breasts!) I'm thankful she has that attitude. Wouldn't it be nice if none of our doctors were preoccupied with our weight?
After exchanging pleasantries, Dr. "S" asked me to disrobe. She did a visual exam and said my incisions are looking very nice. She took a few minutes to comment on her excellent surgical skills...I love her sense of humor! As she began to palpate my incisions, she stopped and hovered over an area underneath my right armpit. She asked if I had felt "that." I said, "if you're talking about that large lump, yes I have." She explained it was scar tissue and fluid build up. She said more than likely it was where the main beam of the radiation was targeted. She began to massage the area and I winced in pain as she did. She explained that she was trying to see if the scar tissue and fluid were able to be broken up by massage. She suggested we try therapeutic massage and she wrote a prescription for that but also mentioned that my husband could provide the same services at no charge. I laughed and told her I'd like to try that option first.
Dr. "S" asked if I had been wearing my "boobs." For those of you who don't know, I had both breasts removed in July without reconstruction and therefore, I have a very expensive pair of silicone breast prostheses. They are extremely heavy even though they are only a B cup. I explained to the doctor that I had not been wearing my boobs and told her why. She said if I don't start wearing them, my body is going to try to compensate for the lack of breast weight and my shoulders will start to round forward in a protective measure. This will cause not only shoulder problems but back pain...great. She said she would write a new prescription for some lighter weight boobs, but I'll have to wait until my deductible for 2015 is met before getting them because they'll cost a fortune. Even with insurance paying their part, the prostheses are very expensive.
I was asked how I was doing on the Tamoxifen and I explained I'd only been on it for 3 days so I hadn't noticed any real side effects yet other than hot flashes. "Usually," she said, "the meds don't really kick in until about 3 weeks and that's when you'll really start getting symptoms." She said if they get too bad, she'll prescribe Effexor to ease the hot flashes. Then she smiled a great big smile and crossed her arms. "They can get pretty bad," she said. Oh great...that's all I need, more side effects and more meds!
As I was leaving her office, Doc gave me a big hug and told me to have a happy New Year. I told her I was going to go home, dust off my fake boobs, and give them a trial run. She told me not to do anything she wouldn't do and I assured her I wouldn't! I guess the New Year will find me looking like a "Brick house" instead of flat and fabulous. I guess gaining a few pounds of silicone is better than gaining a few pounds of fat any day, isn't it? At least I can gain or lose the weight with a flick of the wrist as I unfasten my bra!
What I'm thinking:
I love my doctor! She's the best. She never makes me feel hurried or rushed. She always sits and listens and never makes me feel like I ask dumb questions. I wish all doctors were like her! I definitely don't want any side effects from Tamoxifen, and I don't want any more medication to take to correct the side effects if I do get them. My fake boobs are really heavy and I don't want to wear them but if I must I must. I don't want to have back problems from not wearing my boobs! It's been nice not to have to worry about wearing a bra but it's also been challenging. I am still self conscious about going out in public without boobs.
Listen to the Commodores sing "Brick House"
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