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Saturday, November 22, 2014

The little engine that could

When I was a child, I remember my mother reading me the story of the "Little Engine that Could" by Watty Piper. It was a great children's story focusing on the power of positive thinking. In the story, a long train must be pulled over a high mountain. Several big train engines refuse when they are asked to help. Then the request is made to a very small train engine who agrees to try. The engine succeeds in pulling the train over the mountain while repeating its motto: "I-think-I-can." I love that story because it's a story of hope and determination!

Daily I face many challenges and often times, simple things become next to impossible to accomplish but I keep pushing...I keep trying...I keep saying to myself, "I think I can." Without that determined attitude, I don't think I would be doing as well as I am. When I find that I'm unable to do something I really want to do, my husband reminds me that it's only been 4 months since my surgery. That little reminder helps me realize that I'm doing pretty good and while my energy and strength haven't fully returned, day by day, I'm getting just a little bit stronger.

Yesterday was a long, hard day for me. My daughter was coming down to visit so I began doing the housework early. There was laundry to do, floors to be mopped, bathrooms to be cleaned, and carpets to be vacuumed. My house has always been kept extremely clean but since surgery, I can't keep up the way I did in the past. Instead of cleaning twice a week, now I only do major cleaning twice a month.

My daughter had come down for me to cut and color her hair. That doesn't sound like a complicated thing for most people but having to use my arms so much cause them to really swell up even with my lymphedema sleeves on. I pushed through the pain saying over and over to myself, "I think I can...I think I can."  I did a good job of keeping her from knowing I was hurting.

Later in the day, my daughter needed to run out to the store and asked if I would mind babysitting for a bit. I love spending time with my granddaughter and told her it would be no problem. I was already very tired, but I kept on chugging along. Keeping up with a 15 month old is challenging especially when you're already physically exhausted but I did it.

When it was time for bed, I became very emotional. I was so exhausted and my arms were huge. I cried a little and then fell fast asleep. When I awoke this morning, ready to start the day, I climbed out of bed with my heart set on keeping a steady pace instead of pushing myself so hard. If I do that, "I think I can" will become "I know I can."

©bonnie annis all rights reserved

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