Last night I found a chink in my armor. I didn't even know it was there. I thought I was fully covered and protected in my spiritual armor. Do you want to know how I found it? I was walking through the grocery store doing my weekly shopping. As I meandered up and down the aisles, I'd pass first one woman and then another...all various shapes and sizes. I couldn't help but look at their breasts and think of my upcoming surgery. All of a sudden I began bawling. My husband quickly came to my side and asked me what was wrong. Through my sobs, I finally was able to make him hear and understand what I was saying..."it's true! I'm really going to have both of my breasts removed!" Then I began to bawl even more. For some reason, I was slapped in the face with reality. Oh, I've been trying to be the brave warrior princess. I thought I was doing a really good job at it, but apparently I had a chink in my armor...a place of vulnerability that I didn't know about...and through this chink had come a sneak attack...and I was hit hard.
The devil is always looking for a "chink" in our spiritual armor. There's no doubt if it's there he'll exploit it. However, the Apostle Paul described the pieces of the armor and how to wear it in order to combat the enemy. "Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God." Ephesians 6:10-17.
I thought I had put on ALL of my armor, but apparently I hadn't fastened everything tightly in place. When I got home, after putting away the groceries, I went straight into my prayer closet. On my knees, I fight spiritual battles. I cried out to God and shared my heart with Him. In His love and mercy, He reassured me that it's okay to cry. It's okay to be upset and emotional about this wretched Cancer.
As I lay on the floor, vulnerable and shaken, I felt His overwhelming peace wash over me. His presence was so comforting and as I continued to allow Him to minister to my spirit, I felt like a little girl again...a little girl with her head laying on her father's lap as He tenderly stroked her hair and whispered consolation..."I'm here my daughter. I understand. It's going to be okay. I'm right here with you. I promised I would never leave you and I won't. Trust me. When you are weak, I am strong. Let me be your strength."
I don't know how long I lay there, but when I arose, I knew the chink in my armor had been mended. God had poured His tender love into the fissure and melded it back together. I'm sure there will be other sneak attacks from Satan coming at me in the days ahead, and I plan to be prepared...but I know where I can turn for solace and comfort. There's no place I'd rather be than in the arms of my Heavenly Father. He is a shelter in the storm. He is the lover of my soul and He will never leave me alone.
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