Guest Blogger - my daughter, Jamie Shannon

Cancer....you hear that word more often than not today in so many different situations. Mostly I heard it in movies since I am an avid movie watcher. I never expected to hear it come out of my own mother's lips...and frankly it scared the heck outta me. My mom and I have always been close. In a way I feel like my life has mirrored hers and growing up I always had this fear of losing her. Here on earth she has been my rock. The one who has always been there through every situation...every up and down and the thought of losing her was unbearable. You can imagine my reaction when I received the news...immediate panic. First of all I received it in a text which is not idyllic especially for news so weighty. Secondly, I was at work which is not the place I wanted to be at that moment. I wanted to leave work immediately and run, just get the heck outta dodge. So many emotions ran through me. Do I cry? Scream? Yell? Any of those would have been sufficient for me. Inside I felt all of those things but externally all I could do was hold in my tears as my face took on a blank stare of shock. As soon as my mind re-entered my body and the fog lifted slightly I took my phone and quickly sent a text to the first person that came to mind to get in contact with...my boyfriend. I know it may be strange to some to read that but he and I had become close and with news so devastating I sought comfort from him. He quickly responded his condolences and I resumed my work like a robot.

As I think back to when I first heard the news I understand my reaction. I can't even begin to imagine what was going through my mom's head as she found out. I know it was much worse. As time has obviously elapsed between us first learning of her diagnosis to now, I still see my mom as a strong woman and actually a much stronger one. She has come so far and experienced so much in her life. God has given her the strength to overcome great obstacles. The verses found in James come to mind. James 1:2-3 says:  

"2 Consider it wholly joyful, my brethren, whenever you are enveloped in or encounter trials of any sort or fall into various temptations.

³ Be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience."

As I read these verses over and over again I also remembered what my mom's new friend Karen told her; that God chose her to carry this weight. That it was His purpose for mom to carry it for a reason. That she was special enough to endure it. In the Bible God gave the most difficult of tasks to the ones who were inadequate because He made them adequate. I read somewhere that God does not call the equipped...He equips the called. I believe this wholeheartedly. And believing this doesn't make it easier knowing my mom has cancer by any means, but it does remind me that God is still in control and that His ways are not our ways. Who am I to stand in the way of whatever He is trying to do? As my aunt told me a long time ago, there is no better place to be than in the center of God's will. That's where mom is and no matter what the circumstances, she's in the best place to be. Thank you all for reading! Much love,  Jamie