In a holding pattern

Types of holding patterns

For the past year, I've been so busy just trying to get my life back in order and to gain some sense of normalcy. It's been extremely difficult. If you've been reading my blog, you know all the challenges I've faced. But now, things have slowed down. Although I'm still going to see the oncologist, my life doesn't center around medical tests and treatment any more. It's kind of strange when that's all I've known for the past year and now, I'm wondering what I'm supposed to do. I've always been a very determined, busy person. I've always had a plan.

There was a reason for my trial. I know that beyond a shadow of a doubt. I know it was used to teach me so many things about God and about myself. I've prayed over and over again, asking God what I do next and I've gotten no answer. 

Most of the times in my life when I've prayed about something and I've heard nothing at all from God, that's been a signal for me to wait. I've learned the hard way not to move forward without His clear direction. So, right now, I continue to pray. I continue to wait and I'm in a kind of holding pattern. 

A holding pattern, according to Webster's dictionary, is defined as an oval flight pattern pilots use as they are awaiting instructions to land. The pilot, when ordered by the air traffic controller to go into a holding pattern, must immediately follow instructions. The holding pattern can be very brief or for a continued period of time until the runway is cleared of traffic and ready for the approaching plane to land.

There are many types of holding patterns. Aircraft holding patterns are for landing and take offs. And, we have spiritual holding patterns. Many times God will allow a painful situation or a painful circumstance in our life to engulf us.  This time or season in our spiritual growth is a holding pattern. We cannot move to the right or the left, all we can do is sit and wait. 

The most famous holding pattern I can think of is listed in the Bible. It's the story of a man named Jonah who learned first hand what a holding pattern looked like. God caused a great fish to swallow him up because he was disobedient to God's command. So Jonah sat in the belly of the whale. There was nothing he could do. He couldn't get out! 

God had Jonah's undivided attention and while Jonah was in the belly of the whale. God spoke to Jonah's heart and helped him understand the instructions He had given him. Jonah was all alone and all he could do was think about what God had told him and pray. When Jonah's time in the whale was up, God had the whale spit him out onto the shore. 

At this point in my life, it is clear to me that God has used cancer to place me into a holding pattern. There are three things I've learned from my experience that I'd like to share with you: 

1. The pattern has a purpose - it make take some time for me to understand what the purpose is, but there is a purpose.

2. The pattern has a plan - God did not allow this trial for nothing. He plans to use it for good in my life. 

3. The pattern has a process - the holding pattern will continue until God deems me fit to land! He has work to do during the holding pattern and when His work in me is complete, He will release me to move on with my life. He may equip me for a new ministry or challenge in the process. 

So, the best thing I can do right now, is stop struggling and start listening  intently to what God is saying. I have to remember “For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory . . .”  2 Corinthians 4:17.

As I continue to circle in my holding pattern, I will continue to ask God for clear direction. I will continue to trust Him and continue to praise Him knowing that while I circle, He's working out all the details. 

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